09/01/08

I have decided to have my own column and I intend to 'spout off' about anything that takes my fancy, whether it be politics, sport, music or anything else that rattles my cage.     Topical Talk 2

I think for my first column I shall discuss the merits of 'quality' television programmes and compare "I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!" with "Newsnight".

Or to put it another way - would you rather spend time in the company of 'Tuffers' aka 'The Cat' or Claire Short, that politician who chose to stay in the cabinet despite calling the PM "reckless" before the start of the war with Iraq.

She also stated publicly that she could not stay in the cabinet if there was no second resolution passed by the UN.   Needless to say when we fired the first shot without another resolution she remained at her post, drawing her not insignificant ministerial salary.

At the same time the Leader of the House, the easily dislikeable, Robin Cook did the honourable thing and resigned as a matter of principle.   I am struggling to recall the last person to do so - possibly Lord Carrington at the time of the Falklands War.

My point being is that we have to suffer the ramblings of these so called intellectuals and at the same time be told by others that watching "I'm a celebrity etc" means we must be somehow inferior to the chattering classes, especially those on BBC 2 and folk from Westminster.

Enter Phil Tufnell the "King of the Jungle".   'Tuffers' knocks these stuffed shirts into a cocked hat.    He is the sort of bloke you would meet in the pub and immediately strike up a rapport with.   He gave the impression of being so laid back that he was in danger of falling over, compared to some of the others in the jungle, it was very refreshing.  

He also played Test Match cricket for England, and was a pretty good left arm spinner and a genuine number 11 batsman.   I like cricket but I am willing to bet, that of the millions of people who voted for 'Tuffers', a large percentage think watching cricket ranks with watching milk turn sour as a form of entertainment, therefore they had never heard of him, before he suffered the fate of being cooped up with an assortment of chefs and other nonentities.   Of the others, I knew who Toyah was and I remember Fashanau elbowing Gary Mabbut's eye from it's socket in an 'accident' while playing for Wimbledon , those cavorting cavaliers of the soccer world!   Wayne Sleep is probably the only ballet dancer most blokes could name who have never set foot in the Kirov and there was some wife on who is going out with a liberal politician who sounds more like an anagram, I think she reads a scripted weather forecast at the end of news programmes.   The others?    I have forgotten who they were already.

Apparently more people voted for their favourite 'celebrity' than any of the political parties got during the recently held local elections, so Claire Short should think about that one before she publishes her much pre publicised forthcoming book about her days in the cabinet.   Apparently it all started to go wrong at her first cabinet meeting when the assembled crew were discussing whether to go ahead with the Millennium Dome or not.   As we all know the outcome, it begs the question as to how the saintly Ms. Short managed to put up with it all for another 6 years before she decided that this was not the joined up government in which she felt she could serve.

I think the title of her book could well be "a Collection of Short Stories", remember you read it here first.

Is there anybody out there?

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